you don't exist. please stop trying. get over yourself, and start being real-carey. real-carey can have a messy house, doesn't have to make the bed every morning, can NOT feel guilty for skipping your morning jog and does NOT have to have picture perfect photos every time. (this means you can stop detagging yourself in pictures you deem make you look fat or don't get your "good-side." they're real. you'll appreciate them one day.)
ok, maybe you do have to make the bed, but everything else you can let go.
dear future-carey,
please continue to remind present-day-carey that wanna-be-perfect-carey is only a figment of her imagination. thanks.
dear house,
could you magically clean yourself? nine days of guests has done a number on you, and i would much rather take a nap than clean. i would however, like to wake up to everything (especially the bathrooms) being clean.
ps: if you could help fold the laundry, that would be great too.
dear silly summer tv shows,
you are a waste of time. i refuse to get sucked in this summer.
except maybe top chef.
but that's all!
dear lucy,
you stress me out when you don't eat your breakfast. i freak out and think that you have stomach cancer or something ridiculous like that. just eat your food please.
dear florida humidity,
i don't think you need to stick around for the next three months. you make me sweat, and wanna-be-perfect-carey does not think the rings around my armpits are very flattering.
dear air force,
thank you for sending us to florida. i love getting to see fly boy more often. and i LOVE mornings like this...
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